Antibiotics the size of my big toe & The sentient being inside my earlobe.

Posted on February 29, 2012


Like most people this time of year, I have finally gotten caught in the web of a cold. It started over a week ago with all the usual; sneezing, slight runny nose and general malaise.

 Now, as an allergy sufferer year-round, none of these symptoms alarmed me  of the sleeping beast to come. With a busy schedule I pushed through work and social commitments, all the while the cold catching up with me until it tackled me and put me down. Bronchitis. YUK.

Lifeless. Passionless. UGGH. Antibiotics the size of my big toe(& I have really big feet).

Being sidelined for several days and generally feeling lifeless I watched time just slip away as I lay in various places; the couch, the bed and my office chair. What I find most disturbing about being sick is how it steals away all inspiration I have. I can remember mumbling to myself as I sat down a pile of creative work I planned to get done on the footstool next to couch…”nothing can stop my inspiration!”

Six hours later I awoke. I had achieved nothing except succumbing to the codeine in my cough syrup. Clearly my inspiration could indeed be stopped & stopped rather easily. All the writing I had planned for my blog, my novel rewrite & the reading I had intended to do…POOF! Gone.

In the middle of this sickly cycle I’m in I went to the pharmacy to pick up my prescriptions as well as pick up some extra over-the-counter medicines my Dr. recommended me to pick up to help ward off this type of bronchitis & sinusitis in the future. I take these medications to the counter where the Pharmacist makes me sign something electronically before ringing me up for my drugs.

“You know you can’t take all these at once, right?” he says.

I think he’s got to be outta his mind. There’s like five different kind of drugs there. Some for daytime, some for night, some for only when I get a runny nose.

“Yeah, I think that would be a bad idea” I replied.

“You never know what people will do. I’m here to help them” he says like he’s running for office or something greater.

“The world needs more of you,” I say and realize I have no idea how to finish the sentence. “These drugs can be confusing. This cough syrup would probably kill a cat or bird.” The man was either not impressed or he knew I was right.

“As long as you know sir, that’s all.” He finished ringing me up & I realize I really do need to find a new pharmacy. This grocery store pit-stop I go to is really starting to get on my nerves. What’s next? Will the cashier tell me I shouldn’t put my newly purchased Frank’s buffalo sauce on my rice? Will my pork  go well with my Masala sauce?

I’m a big boy I decided. I know not to take four hundred different cold medicines at once. But all this intrusiveness into my purchases has me wondering how long it is before all of my buying habits are critiqued by some sentient being that I carry around inside my earlobe?

The only way I’m gonna agree to it is if it will guarantee I don’t get a cold that steals away my passion, leaving me feeling like a recently severed eunuch. UGGH. Time to take my couch medicine again.